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7th Human Cloning
Can't Have Kids? Good.
14th Decomposition at The Camera
our local paper is no longer even local
21st A Tale of Two Old Men
John Paul and Fidel party in Cuba
28th A President in Rut
hose him down, and leash that up


4th Ms. Tucker Wobbles the Goalposts
we need to rethink all this again
25th Bowlen's Bloated Boondoggle
the coldly objective sports media sets aside its preferences for public benefit and education........hah!


4th The Ennui of Resistance
holding breath and turning blue in Ohio
25th Momism at Work in Arkansas?
Okay, you explain these murders.........


1st The Black Widow on the Black Ship
a new way to view Titanic
8th Pledge Drive
you know what to do
15th April 15: A Day to Live In Infamy....
The Cancer Trust Tells the Government to Bring It On
22nd National Secretaries Day
For the Paula Jones, the Lynda Tripps...........
29th Activist Nostalgia
an anniversary of an event of almost no importance whatever


13th Cultural Inferiority
Nukes In the Hands of Religious Thugs
19th Personal Assault Craft
badly wanted in heaven


2nd Barry Goldwater
Review this obit carefully.....
10th The Ten Most Wanted
Oh, please!
22nd Love the Sin, Hate the Sinner
Poets and Poetry
24th GM
General Motors Putters Along


15th The Stress of Combat
....as discussed by one who's never been in it...
22nd Bear and His Bunnies and the Coming of the Beast
Sure, they're cute. That's what they want us to think.
29th Impeachment?
Starr proves two people had sex


5th The Balkans, Eurasia's Projects, Need the Swat Teams Not the Negotiators
they deserve each other, but because of the religious element, no sustained war can be tolerated
12th Wanted: Social Lushes and Social Climbing Spouses Not Currently Under Indictment to Represent Us in Foreign Lands
Really, isn't it time to say goodbye to embassies?
19th The Common Sense of the American Public
no longer needs to be burped after hyped scandals
26th Flash! Bill Bennett Announces He Will Refuse Sexual Advances From Interns
Interns Relieved


2nd A Tepid Dawn for the Emerald Isle
God was once asked if peace would ever come to Ireland. "Yes," he said, "but not in my time."
9th You vill SMILE....SMILE....BIG SMILE!
you still haf a fambly in Germany?
16th Next Up: Nude Oil Wrestling with Daniel Zwerdling! This Is Pacifica News!
Note To Guests: make sure you call him 'Danny' in that unpleasantly icky tone implying physical intimacy
23rd And If He'd Done It With Two Women, He'd Be Emperor
no matter how benthic, there is still an unpleasant underside
30th The Ramsey Case
unlikely to appear on anyone's resume in the future


7th An Epiphany From the Steaming Item Behind The Ice Tray
Whether meteor shower or biologic horror, all signs indicate I'm getting old
14th The Gay St. Sebastian
actually, that may be a redundancy.......
28th The Second Congressional Sling Fest '98!
Greenlee and Udall Lower the Bar


4th Huzzah, The Electorate!
....for the most part.....
11th Parents as Victims?
Thwaaackkkkk! Brechhhhhhh! Flaaaaaaaaaht!
18th Stormy with Early Evening Neutrino Storms
our concept of weather expands
25th The Suit Against Microsoft
pay attention here


2nd Hitting Bottom
The Republicans bathe in canting hypocrisy
8th Gun Control for Who?
It's not the punks who scare me most
16th Joltin' Joe, the Yankee Clipper, and His Land of Make Believe
sports is more successful as epic fantasy than role model
23rd Larry Flynt is the Democrats' Santa
"...and the pig got up and slowly walked away...."
30th We Need To Explain This All To Ourselves Again
A cop fires and misses. Metaphor Alert