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A Mexican Birth Certificate!....I...I'm so....Boy, Front! AND a Letter from Juan Valdez of Main St., Pueblo! Please Forgive me, Your Lordship......

if you have a memory of something nice your grandmother said about you, I'll give you keys to the vault!

This is Dark Cloud on Wednesday, December 04, 2002.

There is great hysteria about the new Mexican ID cards that Colorado is discussing accepting in application for driver’s licenses. They aren’t new, of course, Mexico has issued them for over a century, but as a bone the United States is pretending to respect their authenticity. The problem is that the verification of these cards is dependent upon two forms of ID. The first is a Mexican birth certificate. The second is a confirmation of residence from one’s landlord in Colorado. Given both of these items, a Mexican citizen can be offered a “matricula consular” - a card verifying identification, which would officially be considered acceptable. With this, driver’s licenses might be obtained.

Conservatives go bananas. They correctly point out that Mexican birth certificates are about as difficult to copy and forge as homework and, in any case, people are routinely found with numerous different birth certificates, safe in the knowledge that gringos are about as likely to be able to sing entire second acts of lesser known Soviet operas as distinguish the veracity of a Mexican birth certificate.

Conservatives are less vitriolic about slamming landlords for providing written guarantees of a person’s existence. They know that a landlord’s word on virtually any subject is fully the equal of Cardinal Law’s and, in any case, landlords are generally a conservative sort and vote that way. But, the irony is there is nothing to verify the signature as that of an actual landlord and no time or money to do so.

So, equipped with these two glowing elements of self worth and identity – a Mexican birth certificate and a letter from a work slaver or another illegal alien – Mexican residents in the United States could get a driver’s license.

Is this the very description of horse hockey or what? Two notes from a foreigner’s mother are about as truthful and easy to verify. People are justified in being upset that this simply opens our southern border. Of course, individual businesses don’t have to accept forms of identification that they choose not to, as I’ve previously described.

But there is another whiff of surrealism here. Are the equivalent identifications in this country worth much more?

Let me assure you, I can obtain your birth certificate easily enough, as you could mine. With that and a social security card, traditionally not difficult to get, you can receive a passport. With a passport you can obtain much, like a driver’s license. It is superfluous for me to announce that birth certificates and social security cards – easily forged or stolen – have nothing but type on them, and apparently in the age of the computer aren’t hard to change or create. Once affixed to the driver’s license or passport, it is an identification that takes quite a bit to dislodge.

Like our money, identification in this nation is dependent upon the good will and prudent rule of our laws and government. It is, under attack, a chimera. Our dollar is worth this much because we say it is, and you believe it. I am who I say I am because my government attests to it – the same folks who wink at criminal factories of false identifications at every college campus.

Here is another example of why drug and alcohol laws, as presently expressed, are dangerous and stupid. Most adults in this country, I would wager, have had fake identifications. They don’t value the real ones, particularly, beyond their ability to obtain booze and credit cards. We have raised too many generations of children with double standards about what laws to obey, what laws to make others obey, what laws to ignore.

I doubt the percentage of Mexican citizens with garbage identifications in this nation is higher, per capita, than that to be found on any college campus.

We reap what we have sown. The war against Islamic anti-Occidents will be won by ignoring the Constitution because we have debased the lesser methods: we don’t believe our own identifications because we view them only as obstacles to obtaining our fixes. We know how prevalent it is, it was, it surely will be until our government unloads these absurd restrictions that have denigrated our estimation of law in general to no moral, medical, social, judicial, or civilized benefit.