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Dog Poop to Koch Brothers

not such a stretch......

This is Dark Cloud on Wednesday, April 02, 2014.

Here in Boulder the Damned, City Council last night endured what must have been an interminable few hours of public input on leash laws for dogs on Open Space, which followed a first reading of new financial disclosure laws for municipal government. I wasn't there, Seal Team 6 could not make me attend, but I checked out the live blog by the Daily Camera and read up on things this morning. FYI, someone stood and read the Declaration of Independence deep into proceedings. An alleged dog owner had to be escorted out. The same things were said 4500 times by different people, and the Cabernet Sauvignon was totally gone by 8:30, and they had to go on Merlot so popular in Martin Acres and two trailer parks and indistinguishable to my distinguished pallet from Texaco Sky Chief. Quite honestly, on evenings like that, I could forgive a Councilman chugging from a box of MD 20-20. I cannot forgive the limp lettuce and cucumber sandwiches they served the last evening I attended, which looked to be on the table again.

First, my humanity concerns for poor Council members having to endure all this was dampened considerably by their horrid decision in the matter, which reduced to essentials is: let the Park Rangers and some to-be-named-later innocent judge to handle these disputes. After a career of receiving death threats from Mafia lords in New Jersey, and drug kingpins everywhere, these poor innocents are in no way prepared to deal with Boulder in a fit.

The problem is that Open Space trails are too crowded, with walkers, bikes, horsemen, walkers and bikers and horsemen with dogs, and dogs without any connection to the human species whatsoever and not under any sort of control. There are, of course, dogs under exquisite voice command, a credit to their species and the superior genes of their owners. They exist, and I've seen them. I see them as often as Grizzly Bears, Tasmanian Tigers, Judge Crater, Jimmy Hoffa, justification for voter suppression, and Republican's superior plans for Obamacare Overhaul. There are many complaints about ill mannered dogs on the trails, which I believe, and how generally awful they are in tales of dubious nature, which I do not, but there is a problem. I suspect it's because newly bolstered numbers of elderly are inconvenienced by, and scared of, dogs larger than something owned by Queen Elizabeth.

They established a licensing program for dogs, where you buy a green tag to show you're paid with the assumption that the animals are under voice command, which virtually none are, and rather than enforce this requirement they diffuse the problem and kick the can down the road. Which infuriates me. There is talk of increasing Ranger presence to enforce these sorta subjective rules and for judges to enforce subjective rules, and this rather than eliminate badly behaved dogs in the first place but disallowing a tag to those who fail the test.

But of course I can barely summon the energy since the Associated Press has largely dedicated itself to mourning television shows that ceased their run. Another show I had never seen, How I Met Your Mother, has died as, apparently, had the mother, consigned by children and husband to the memory hole as soon as his horns sprouted. It began to feel unpatriotic if we did not have a good cry over what sounded like a pedestrian and laugh tracked show.

I don't think there were ever less than 45 continually updated variants on this story, which absorbed enough space that the news media failed to notice that the Crimea catastrophe was seemingly not such a big deal in Crimea or in the Ukraine. There were a lot of unarmed soldiers marching about to no real objection, and Obama was again correct in restraint and knowledgeable action, along with political sputterings that are as required in these events as forgiving turkeys on Thanksgiving.

The Republicans have raised a number of issues that arouse no one outside their base. Benghazi, the Ukraine, and fake religious freedom, while Obamacare, with forceps and barely breathing, was ushered into the world. Seven and a half million people signed up, costs are going down or rising slower than they ever did each year previously. People with health insurance are feeling good.

Of course, as I type, the Supreme Court just removed all caps to political contributions. The commercials this election will be brutal, as the Koch Brothers need the Third Rate White Man's vote big time. Again.